14 years ago Today

14 years ago today we experienced the most emotional day we ever have.

I was 1 month from my due date and we were expecting identical twins. For months we had been reading stories from Mikes grandpa of the adventures he had had with his identical twin. Tales about trading places in classes and playing switch on their dates. We laughed and tried to imagine the fun our little girls would have.

We had just unpacked a double stroller from the box. There were two cribs set up in the nursery with matching Noah's ark bedding (appropriate because the animals were two by two) which I and my sister had made. We were ready! We had been buying diapers ever since we found out we were having twins and had a closet full of them. Along with many matching outfits for them to wear. On the way to our routine Dr. appt. we stopped at a dress shop and picked up two beautiful dresses for our baby girls to be blessed in. We had already picked up two adorable white blankets for the occasion.

I will never forget the look on the Doctor's face as he first looked at the screen of the ultra-sound machine. He turned the screen and studied it for a moment while we couldn't see. Then he began to tell us the bad news. One of our twins had died. Her umbilical cord was wrapped around her sisters leg and, as we would later find out had been severed. In order to save the other baby we were sent immediately to the hospital to be induced. She would have to be born soon or she too would die. We called our family and had more support from them than I thought possible. Everyone who could be there was, And there were many prayers said in our behalf.

Labor went quickly and within a few hours we had a baby girl, but she was quickly whisked away to the NICU because of contamination from being in the same sack as her sister. I wasn't able to see her until many hours later. After midnight.

About an hour after the delivery we were able to spend some precious time with our little Taylor Jade. We took some time to say good bye to our little girl and commit to memory her tiny features. Then we invited the grand parents in to do the same. What a tender and emotional time for us. Let's just say that we were grateful for the knowledge we have that we will be with her someday. This life is not the end.

Finally as they were transferring me to the recovery room they took me to see my baby girl. She had so many wires and tubes hooked up to her, and she looked so tiny and fragile.
It was such a joy to finally be able to hold her!
( I couldn't find any of the pictures of her all hooked up to the wires, but this one was taken within a few days of bringing her home.)
The next few weeks were an emotional blur. Planning a funeral for our baby, Spending time at the hospital with our other baby, Mike going back to work, and both of us trying to keep from falling apart at the same time. We were so blessed by many wonderful people who went out of their way to make sure we were okay. Finally we were able to take our little Alex Nicole home and life seemed like it just might become normal again.
Finally we were a family.
Alex has been such a joy to our family. Her bright happy smile brightens every day.
Age 2. . .

She was soo excited to go to preschool. especially because it meant she got to ride a bus to school like the big kids in our neighborhood did.
Age 4. . .

After hearing about a group of girls that had donated their hair for wigs for sick kids, Alex decided to donate her long beautiful hair to "Locks of Love" so that some sick little girl could have pretty hair too. We had to have some good pictures so we could remember how long and beautiful her hair looked
Age 5

She is so friendly and fun to be around. She is the one in the middle with her tongue hanging out. Kaisha (cousin) is behind her and Kirsti (sister) in front.She is such a ham!
This picture was actually taken when she was 12 but it is the most current individual picture we have of her. . .

I am so glad we have been blessed to have Alex as part of our Family. She has grown up to be a wonderful young woman, and is a great example to her younger sisters and brother.
We LoVe YoU AlEx!